Last week I attended the Mind Matters Summit in Cape Town. One of the keynote speakers was Mo Gawdat – the former Chief Business Officer at Google X, author of Solve for Happy, and someone who’s made it his life’s work to help people understand happiness. While his speak was mostly about AI, his primary work has also included stress management and happiness. With a touch of autism (his own confession), Mo has the ability to deliver straight talking messages:
“Happiness isn’t about avoiding pain – it’s about navigating it consciously.”
I realised, sitting there in a room full of people nodding in agreement, that I’ve spent the better part of the last year navigating, but not consciously. I’ve been deep in what’s known as high-functioning burnout – that strange, relentless state where you keep performing, achieving, showing up… while slowly emotionally detaching behind the scenes.
- Friday nights with Mom? No thanks, “I can not be faced with having to answer another question.”
- Keen to write a blog post? No thanks. “My creativity is dead.”
- Keen to go out? Not really, “Maybe I’ve just lost my spark since turning 40?”
And I know I’m not alone.
What High-Functioning Burnout Looks Like
High-functioning burnout doesn’t look like the “traditional” idea of burnout – no dramatic collapses or giving-up-on-life montages. You’re still ticking boxes, meeting deadlines, sending those emails, and appearing “together” from the outside. But underneath, there’s:
- A constant low-level exhaustion that no amount of sleep fixes.
- Feeling “fine” but never actually well with feelings of detachment.
- Running on autopilot and losing joy in the things you used to love.
- Snapping at small things, then beating yourself up for it.
- Counting down to your next holiday but not really looking forward to it.
The Cost of Always Coping
For me, the last year has been full on at work. We have had 3 changes in management, half a dozen changes in staff, over scoped and under pressure, retrenchments, it’s been FULL ON. And I now realise I was also operating in survival mode. That “push through, get it done, you can rest later” mentality.
The problem is, “later” never comes.
Mo Gawdat spoke about how our modern world has trained us to measure our worth by our output – and how dangerous that can be if we don’t pause to ask ourselves: What is all this for?
Why I’m Taking a Break
I’m going on leave next week. For once, I’m trying not to treat it like a productivity exercise – no meticulously planned itineraries, no “while I’m away” task lists disguised as rest. I’m choosing space. I’m choosing stillness. I’m choosing to not apologise for needing both.
Because as Mo reminded us, happiness doesn’t live in what’s next — it lives in noticing what’s here.
If You’re There Too
If any of this resonates, you’re not broken and you’re not failing. You’re human.
Here are a few things I’ve been trying to practice — imperfectly, but intentionally:
- Micro-rest, not just macro-rest — Taking small pauses daily, not waiting for annual leave to save me.
- Boundaries that stick — Saying no before resentment creeps in.
- Checking in, not checking out — Asking “how am I really?” rather than distracting myself endlessly.
- Redefining success — Shifting from “how much did I get done” to “how much did I live today.”
It’s not easy. But neither is living in a constant state of depletion.
Final Thought
High-functioning burnout can trick you into thinking you’re fine – until you’re not. So maybe the bravest thing we can do is stop proving, start noticing, and, as Mo Gawdat so beautifully put it, “choose happiness deliberately.”
Next week, that’s exactly what I’m going to try.
