When we think about what makes someone successful in the workplace, we often focus on the obvious—technical skills, competence, and experience. But as you rise in your career, you’ll realise that those are just the baseline. The real game-changer? How you communicate. Soft skills—things like emotional intelligence, tone, delivery, and the ability to connect with others—often carry more weight than technical knowledge. You could have the best ideas in the room, but if you don’t communicate them in a way that resonates, they may never see the light of day.
“When we listen to someone speak,” writes behavioural researcher Vanessa Van Edwards, “we’re listening for two things: confidence and emotion.” The power of how you say what you say is often underestimated. Meanwhile, people
remember how you make them feel before they remember what you said.
A Personal Lesson
I once attended a high-profile conference where the organisers made a small but thoughtful tweak to the schedule that most attendees wouldn’t even notice. The event host had subtly adjusted the proceedings to match the personal speaking style of the keynote speaker. It seemed like a minor detail, but the impact was profound. The speaker felt completely at ease, delivered an electrifying presentation, and left the audience inspired. That small adjustment made all the difference. More recently, I sat in a meeting where a client was pitching an idea to my team. What stood out wasn’t just the substance of their presentation, but how they delivered it. They intentionally used key terms and language that my institution is known for. Without explicitly saying it, they aligned themselves with our organisation’s values and way of thinking. The result? A seamless, engaging conversation that
flowed effortlessly. It wasn’t just a presentation—it became a dialogue. We influence people not just by what we say, but by how we say it.
The Workplace Language Code
In today’s fast-paced, diverse and multi-generational workforce, communication is more than just exchanging information. It’s about connection, influence and trust. And trust me, the language you use in the workplace matters. Have you ever noticed how some people seem to navigate corporate spaces effortlessly? They build strong relationships, get their ideas heard, and command respect without being the loudest voice in the room. Their secret? They’ve mastered the art of saying the right things, in the right way, to the right audience. Sometimes, what we perceive as exclusion in the workplace isn’t about competence—it’s about
communication. The way we phrase things, the tone we use, and even the little cultural nuances we incorporate into our speech can determine how well we connect with others. I’ve seen conversations take a complete 180-degree turn just because someone on the team added a simple “Egbon” (a Yoruba term for an elder sibling) while addressing a senior colleague. That single word
shifted the atmosphere from rigid and formal to warm and collaborative.
Now, this isn’t about flattery or pretending to be someone you’re not. It’s about understanding the power of language and using it to build bridges rather than walls.
But why should you even care about how you communicate in the workplace?
- Respect and Reciprocity: People respond positively when they feel seen, heard and valued. The way you speak to colleagues, clients, and superiors can either strengthen or weaken relationships.
- Grabbing and Holding Attention: Have you ever zoned out during a speech or meeting? That’s because the speaker failed to engage. How you present your ideas determines whether people listen or tune out.
- Creating Access and Alignment: Speaking in a way that aligns with your audience fosters unity of purpose. The more people feel like you’re “one of them,” the more willing they are to listen, collaborate and support you.
- Authenticity and Influence: People can spot inauthenticity from a mile away. Speaking with confidence and emotional intelligence makes you more relatable, trustworthy and persuasive.
The Takeaway
In your next presentation, team meeting, or client pitch, don’t just focus on what you’re saying, pay attention to how you say it. Be intentional. Take note of the words, tone and communication style that resonate with your audience. Be observant. Don’t be rigid—adjust your communication style to fit different situations and people. Be emotionally intelligent. Read the room, recognise unspoken cues, and communicate in a way that fosters connection.
