Inside X’s Mission to Make Robots Boring

Hi, everyone! A “decentralized autonomous organization” (translation: a group of crypto lovers) has decided to buy an original copy of the Constitution. Maybe they’ll add Satoshi’s signature? 

Every afternoon at 1:30, the robots file into the café. Gliding their way into the dining area on four wheels, the cadre of one-armed creatures weave through a maze of tables. Like hunters stalking prey, they swivel their binocular-sized heads, staring at their surroundings through an array of cameras and sensors. Additional vision is supplied by a Lidar sensor, similar to those on autonomous cars. If these robots had weapons, their appearance would incite panic. But instead, attached to the end of each of those robot arms is a custom squeegee.